My name is an Enigma apparently.

I'll start my first ever blog by saying that I've never really been a fan of blogging. I thought it was a fairly self indulgent and pretentious act. Although I enjoy reading and commenting on other people's blog's, I never had the urge to start my own, until now. Nothing really significant happend in my life to want to start blogging. However, every so often I would come to a place in a real life conversation with someone, and feel the things I were saying were "over the line". Don't you hate that? Seriously, when someone tells me I've "gone too far" it makes my insides die. The person saying it is, what, above you in some way? The thing you said was so low that they could not even fathom coming up with a response other than: "dude, that was too far." Although this is kind of off topic, these are the kind of ideas that go through my head all the time, and this blog will be moderatly peppered with this kind of material.

In a nut shell, I wanted to have a place where I could speak my mind without the standard social "borders" that I face in everday life. That's basically why any one starts a blog really, so its nothing new.

So my name has a story behind it. It was given passed on to me from my mother's late first husband, who is my bioligical father's brother. Merrill (Brother, late husband) died in an explosion, if you can imagine that. Not many people can say they know of someone who died in an actual explosion, so I figure that's pretty crazy right off the bat right? Anyway, after he died, a few years later my dad did the most biblical thing you could do: marry your late brother's wife. They had my two older sisters, and then me. My dad wanted to have a son to bond with. I can't say I had the most ideal characteristics for him: I'm not all that smart, I'm fairly artistic, and I'm "outgoing". If you knew my dad, these would all be polar opposites to his personality. Anyway, they named me Merrill in rememberance of the late Merrill.

That's where it all started. The name. The curse if you will. As a little boy, the last thing you wanted your name to rhyme with is girl. And whamo, you're thrown into a pit of poor jingles that bash your name with comparrisons to girl's, squirells and the act of twisting and twirling with both of them. Trust me it's a nightmare; you go thank your mother for your name right now.

My life has not gained from my name being Merrill, at all. I'm not saying a name is supposed to bring certain privledges, but honestly, it shapes who you are. If you like yourself, your name most likely isn't Merrill, it's probably Zack, or John, or somthing one syllable that cannot get confused with anything humorous.

These are just a few confrontations:

When meeting someone for the first time, in a crowd ambient setting, I am gaurenteed to have to say my name at least 2-3 times before someone hears it. Something like this: Person "hi, name's Chad" and then I say "Hi; Merrill"..."what's that?"....."um, Merrill"......"earl?"...... "no, MERRILL". this happens frequently.

While buying a cellphone, the prick saleskid asked if my mom was a co-signer on my account (thinking her name was Merrill).

The doctor walks in to the room and says "ok, 'meryl'....and...streep" looking at me and then my wife. (what is wrong with you? seriously, to be at a place in your life when you think it is ok to come into a room, with a complete stranger, make a negative comment about their name, and think that, "yes, that is a clever thing to say....I will say this and be happy with its out come.., I am confident in my actions, and will say things to people, regardless of its outcome."

Tellemarketers, just don't even bother trying to say my name, you're obviously incompetant, just say nothing.

While buying frozen yogurt, they ask for your name to write on the cup because they are ridicously slow at making it and can't keep up with demand. First, I have to spell my name out, you remember,: "earl?"....no, M E R R I L L. then they just write it with one L at the end. What is wrong with you? seriously, I said two L's, you just didn't have it in you to add that last one on there? Its pure laziness.) then I'm waiting for the frozen yogurt, and then the girl with the first of the two yogurts I purchased, turns and has the most PUZZELED look on her face, like my name is written in Hebrew, and barely utters my name and passes it on. The second yogurt, which was made by a different girl, turns and attempts to say my name " muh....muh-errrr, I don't know how to say this..." Either our education system is not teaching language in our schools anymore, or there is just some genuinely dumb people, which there is for sure.

These are just a few instances that I can remember off the top of my head, and If I think of anymore, or if it happens again (which it will) I will be sure to add it to this list.